


Templar Dearest

by I_llbedammned



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Addiction, Alley Sex, Dancing, Drunken Flirting, Drunken Shenanigans, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-30
Updated: 2018-02-22
Packaged: 2018-03-20 08:38:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,421
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3643794
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/I_llbedammned/pseuds/I_llbedammned
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cullen has been struggling for a while with his lyrium addiction and sometimes it still gets to him.  So he seeks out the one person that he knows that he can trust: Cassandra.  What follows is something that neither of them expected, but that both of them needed on some level.</p><p>Takes place while the Dragon Age Inquistion game is going on.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Moment of Weakness

The night was warm and the crickets chirped merrily in the bushes around the garden as Cullen made his way across it. The stars glittered up in the sky and his eyes trailed upwards searching. What exactly he was searching for now though, he had no clue. Some part of him, even with his faith shaken in the Chantry as it was, still hoped that there might be a message up there for him, but only the sounds of crickets met his ears.

He looked around and tried to search the yard for anybody wandering about, but the hour was so late that anybody of a sane and rational mind had gone to sleep. It should have been a pleasant night, the garden's flowers made everything smell like elfroot and roses and he knew that they had just had a tremendous victory against Corypheus' men. Most people were pleasantly drunk on victory, but tonight his thoughts seemed determined to ruin any good mood that he tried to share in. He was at the bar with the troops when it first settled in and hadn't left since. He had a pint, nothing that even fazed him, when someone mentioned the red lyrium problem they were having. His thoughts drifted to Samson, to how he let this man slip by him when he should have been the first one to see that things were going wrong, how he once let his faith blind him to facts that were very obvious to other people. These thoughts wound around him like a dark cloak and his men did not notice him getting more and more silent as time went by. They gathered around him 'til he felt like he should leave. 

His agitated mind led his feet all over the keep, but the sounds of his own footsteps on cold stone did nothing to soothe him. In the earlier hours he had searched the sea of familiar faces for someone to confide in, but every time that he would find one he made some sort of excuse about why they did not need to be bothered with his problems at that particular moment. The victories they had been few and hard fought he would not be the one to ruin it for someone. His thoughts had led him up to the ramparts where he had gazed upon the cold mountains surrounding them and thought. He could feel the loss, the addiction burning through his blood and making it hard to concentrate. Deep breaths were pumped through his chest, but he couldn't focus himself enough to calm his beating heart. The precipice that he was standing on looked so promising, like he could just fall off at any time.

No, that was it that was too much. He needed to find someone, even if it meant ruining their night. But who? The thought jumped out at him: Cassandra. She had told him many times that if he ever needed someone he should go find her. He knew that she had retired early this night and would be in her room. He forced his addled mind to go find her, which is what had led him to the gardens at this late hour. Maybe she was asleep, maybe she would just turn him away, but he had to take a chance. Anything was better than falling.

As he made his way out of the gardens and on to stone he could see candlelight spilling out from below Cassandra’s door. Well that either meant that she was most likely awake. That was good, wasn't it? As he approached the door he paused, rethinking his decision to ever come here and knowing that he should bear the burden of this himself since he was the one responsible for these problems. With a heavy hand he reached forward to knock on her door, hoping desperately that she would answer it. The aches that were coming because of his past were adding up and everything felt like it was becoming difficult. Minutes passed with no answer and he was about to turn away when the heavy wooden door swung open.

Cassandra looked like she had been sent from the Maker himself, her back lit by the flames from the fireplace and dressed in a red tunic and cloth breeches. He was still in his ceremonial garb, fancy white tunic with a brown doublet and a mantle of fur, but he felt like he was woefully underdressed under her gaze.

"Cullen? What are you doing here?" She asked, her voice more confused than abrasive.

"Cassandra," He paused trying to find the words while she stood confused, "May I please come in?" His voice sounded a little more desperate than he intended, or perhaps than he was willing to admit.

"Yes of course, come in." She said, stepping aside and letting him pass into her small room. Her light brown eyes were searching him and it was almost more than he could bear. Despite all of his struggles knowing that she could see him in such a state, even if he hadn't said anything yet, and made him feel naked and exposed than the demons in the Circle Tower had.

He paced uneasily over stone and carpet. The words were there he just needed to find them, and he could only find them if his mind could focus past the beating of his heart and the rising tide of anger. His hands went to his head as if they could stem the tide of the thoughts by force. The words came out as a rush. "You said once that if I needed someone I could find you and-"

"Has something happened?" Cassandra asked, concern coming over her features. 

"No, not exactly." He forced out, "It's just my mind. That's all." He turned on heel to leave. "This was foolish. I shouldn't be disturbing you at this hour over something so trivial."

"Cullen, wait," She said, reaching out and grabbing a hold of his arm before he had gone too far. Out of instinct he pulled his arm away, ready to strike.

"Don't touch me!" he yelled, louder than he intended as he stepped away. In an instant he realized what he had done and regretted it. He steadied his voice. "My apologies. You-you didn't deserve that."

Cassandra looked bewildered, "Maybe you should just sit down for a bit. Rest and everything will come to you."

"I should," he said, looking at the chair by the fire but not taking it, "But if I sit down I fear my head might just burst. Everything is too much, too hot, too much movement. Nothing stays still long enough for me to be able to voice it."

"What can I do to help?" Cassandra asked, looking like she was readying herself for a battle.

"I don't know. I just-” He paused and a dull ache was in his heart. "I just don't want to be alone right now." If he was a stronger man he supposed that he would cry, but he couldn't bear the thought of Cassandra seeing him so distraught. It was bad enough she had to deal with his inane, lyrium deprived ramblings.

"My door is always open to you. Stay as long as you need." Her voice was gentle and her body relaxed as she leaned up against the footboard of her bed.

"Thank you," he said. A minute passed in silence, "I shouldn't be like this. I should be stronger than the lyrium they put through my system."

"It is not a matter of being stronger," Cassandra said simply, "It is just a matter of time. You can't expect years of conditioning to slip away."

Cullen's fists clenched at his side as he paced towards a stone wall, "Cass, it has been months and it still hasn't gotten any easier. How long am I supposed to wait before I am functional and able to stand on my two feet rather than bumbling around like a child?" He let out a yell in frustration at his own inability to be stronger than the Chantry's conditioning. How could he lash out against red templars when he was just as weak as they were for succumbing to that accursed drug?

"You are doing fine," Cassandra said, though her voice waivered a little. She wasn't used to seeing him like this and it shook her to see such a strong man laid low by situations beyond his control. "We are doing well and it is only because of your expertise and control that we are able to win battles."

"How many more could we have won, how many more lives could have been saved at Haven, if my mind had been fully clear?"

"Don't." she said sternly, raising herself off of the footboard and walking towards him. "You cannot walk down the path of could haves. No one knows what could have happened. You could have tried to save people and perished yourself, dooming us all in that moment. Only darkness and regret lay down the paths of "maybe"."

He turned away from her to face the fire, staring into it and letting the flames ebb away some of his anger. Somehow that helped, the chaos and the heat giving some sort of direction to him though not quite enough to let him feel stable. He walked closer to the fire, grabbing a hold of the back of the wooden chair sitting there, a book still open upon it though he didn't focus too long upon it. "You should be the one leading these armies, not me. You practically formed this Inquisition out of nothing but ashes and aren't nearly as compromised as I am. You truly have cut all your ties to the Chantry when I have been unable to. You are not as weak as I am." His shoulders slumped with that admission, his anger now giving way to sadness.

"You have not given in. That is more than any other templar, ex or otherwise, can say. Most would die if they tried to do what you have done." She was close now, he could hear her footsteps behind him and he took solace in the strength of her voice, "Yet you haven't died. You command armies and give advice to some of the most powerful forces Thedas has seen in centuries. It is only by your strength that they follow you, it is only because of your strength that I follow you." She stood beside him now and he let his gaze go from the fire to her while she continued, "You know as well as I do that I would never follow someone who I thought to be lesser or weaker than I was."

"Oh Cass," he practically whimpered, his voice falling to deeper depths."I am far weaker than anyone knows. I wouldn't be here if I wasn't. I can't keep this up forever, I know I can't."

"You can and you will." she said resolutely. With her voice she left no room for him to question either her or himself.

"No," his voice cracked and he felt as though he would collapse inward on himself leaving nothing but a withered husk behind. Now that his anger had drained it was like a fire with nothing left to burn but ashes. "I-I can't do this. Not alone."

"You are not alone. Not unless you want to be." she said, extending a hand to meet his. Her calloused hands wrapped her fingers around his and he held them for a minute. Halfway without thinking he moved away from the chair, closing the distance between them. With desperation and need he wrapped his arms around her, holding her strong form close. She moved her hands to hold the back of his head and the small of his back, returning his strength with her own. His body trembled, though tears still refused to come. His voice seized in his throat, taking his words with them. Together they stood and he let his eyes close, taking in the simple comfort of her arms around him. Gently her hands stroked his hair and made small circles on his back.

Need seized him and he desperately needed to be closer to her. One of his hands made its way to her neck and moved her jaw towards his own. With a leap of faith he pressed his lips to hers, hoping that she would not refuse him. After a small delay she slid her lips upon his, her mouth opening and her tongue exploring his mouth. His thoughts were quiet now as he lost himself within the kiss, focusing on her hands and her mouth upon his. Some small part of him wished that this would last for an eternity, even though he knew that they must part eventually.

She broke off the kiss first, "Cullen, are you sure about this?"

"I am more sure of this than anything I have been in years."

She backed away and he gave her some distance. Her hands shook, "I just kissed the Knight Commander. This....complicates things."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make your life harder." Regret poured into the space where her kiss used to be.

"No. It is not a bad thing." She said, confidently.

"It's not?" he asked, his surprise genuine.

"It's just different, a lot to take in."

"I understand." he said, feeling his strength beginning to return. "I should be going anyway. We both will need sleep."

There was a pause before Cassandra chimed in, her hand going to the back of her head, “Yes that probably is for the best. I need to think anyway."

"Yes, thinking might do both of us some good." He noted, "Good night Cassandra. Sleep well."

"You too Cullen."

With that he left, not sure of what the future for them would hold but for once feeling like there might be a spot of light in all the darkness albeit very far away.


	2. May I Have This Dance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> At a gathering of nobles Cassandra and Cullen manage to get a few minutes alone together, a calm among the storm that they both struggle against.

The Knight Commander found himself wandering by himself in a garden again, but a garden much different than Skyhold's. Here everything was finely trimmed and kept, a pretty face over an ugly affair. Cullen despised these fancy affairs. Somewhere there were armies being raised and here he was having drinks with pretty women who would never know his name if he did not have a title in the Inquisitor's army. Just to get these few moments by himself in the garden he had to pretend like he was going to consult the Inquisitor about something related to the war to keep them from following him.

"Damn these noble bastards." he heard a voice coming from his left. He turned towards the familiar face of Cassandra, her face turned away from him and looking at someone hidden from his view by a hedge. She was more lovely of a sight than he would have imagined, dressed in a ceremonial breast plate emblazoned with the Inquisitorial eye and lavender silk tunic. He was sure that another man would have preferred to see her in a dress, but she would not have been comfortable and it would have shown.

"Running into issues too?" He asked and she started while her head snapped towards him.

"Oh, uh, Commander. I did not expect to see you there. My apologies for disturbing you."

He smiled slightly, "You don't need to apologize. I can understand your frustration. These affairs are rather strangling."

"I expected that." Cassandra said, still sounding annoyed though he was quite sure that it wasn't directed at him. Her gaze wandered back over to the offending party beyond the hedges. "What I didn't expect was for drunken noblemen's sons to be pawing at me all night. I had to walk away lest I give them a direct demonstration of the unarmed techniques that I have learned over the years." 

At this note Cullen could feel anger flicker to life inside of him. The thought of Cassandra being so disrespected was infuriating, even though he knew that she was a warrior who could defend herself. It just didn't seem....right to have someone like her treated like she was a loose wench for the taking. Apparently the look on his face seemed to suggest that because Cassandra rolled her eyes at him. "Don't worry, I didn't do it. I know how important these politics," she said spitting out that word like it was a foul curse, "Are to maintaining our power. I just don't like it."

He walked closer to her, looking at the offending group. They were young, probably no more than eighteen, and dressed in finely embroidered velvets. Doubtless someone like Leliana or Josephine would have known their exact lineage and who their father was, but all Cullen saw was spoiled children who had never been reprimanded a day in their lives gloating and laughing while trying to grab at anything female. He saw enough of it when he worked in Hightown, but it seemed more offensive now. It wasn't because he cared for Cassandra though, no, it was only because here they should have been on their best behavior. Yes, that was it. "I would not blame you if you did give them a demonstration. They seem like they could use one." He noted, the smile having faded from his lips.

Cassandra snorted, "That would be quite the sight, wouldn't it? The so-called Seeker for the Inquisition making a fool of some highborn lord's sons in front of everyone. I bet people would be talking about it for months."

"Might almost be enough to make this party interesting." He said grimly, turning away lest he go over there and show them the value of common courtesy himself.

That got a laugh out of Cassandra as she too turned away to look upon the broad expanse of inhabited garden, "Are you not entertained by hearing about Lord Tyvalt's daughter's pregnancy and how his shoes are last season?"

"At least you got that much. All I get is giggling girls with doe eyes asking me how I got the scars on my face and telling me how exciting it is that I survived both Fereldan's Blight and the fall of the Circles in Kirkwall." He began to walk further into the garden with her by his side.

She laughed, "Girls with doe eyes don't capture you then? I am quite surprised." She said with a rare wry smile playing across her face. "Most of the men seem to collect them like trophies."

He snorted in derision, his voice coming out far grimmer than he intended it to, "I have enough trophies and medals and laurels to rest upon for a lifetime. If that was all I needed I could have retired many years ago and grown fat while the world burned." 

"Ah." Cassandra said and he looked over at her. From the look on her face, the way that her jaw shifted around uneasily, he could tell that she was thinking over something. He let her think, both of them lapsing into silence that was filled only by the soft sounds of violins drifting over them from the party. She picked some lavender off of a carefully manicured plant and began to pick the flowers off of the stem, mashing them between her fingers before letting them fall to the ground. "What is it exactly that you want then if not trophies?" she asked finally.

He slowed his steps to a gradual stop and looked up thoughtfully, "Depends on what exactly you mean I guess."

"You know from life or-" She paused fumbling with the words, "Matters of the heart." He could see a slight color rising to her cheeks, but he didn't dare comment upon it lest he incur her wrath.

"Well, I,” Now he was the one who was trying to find the right words to say. There had been a lot going on and for most of his life he had just gone where he was needed. Rarely did he ever leave himself time to think let alone to think of such selfish thought like what he wanted out of life. "I'm not sure. I want to be needed I think. Whatever I am doing for my job, I think that it would be a noble cause to be needed. Right now I am with the Inquisition because they need me, because someone needs to lead the armies and stop the world from getting swallowed up by the darkspawn armies. That's as close as I ever got to the answer at least."

"Oh. That is a good answer." She said and let the statement hang there with all of its weight.

His brown eyes focused upon her, "What about you? What is it that you want Cassandra?"

"What do I want?" she asked incredulously, "It depends on who is asking: is it Cullen or the Knight Commander?"

He knew what she meant by that statement and replied gently, "It is just me, just Cullen. This is not about title or the station. Maker knows we are far enough away from those nobles that we no longer need to worry about those things."

She walked a bit closer to him, "I think then what I want is to dance."

He blinked at her in response, "You are asking me to dance?" Leave it to Cassandra to be blunt about what she wanted rather than playing games.

"Yes. I asked you did I not?" Her voice came out annoyed.

"I thought you hated to dance."

"Normally I do." She said her gaze faltering and her confidence falling away, "Is that a no then?"

He shook his head, "No, I mean yes." He paused, "I would love to have a dance with you. I was just surprised, that's all."

"Good." She said, regaining her stone expression. In contrast to her face her hands were gentle and soft as she grabbed his. He wrapped his right arm around her waist and pulled her closer as she did the same for him. The cold metal of the breastplate was against his chest. Both of them stood there, tense at first, but gradually relaxed into each other's grasp. He let her lead the dance, a bit of a change from what he was used to but she seemed to be more comfortable leading than he was. This close she smelled like the lavender flowers that she had been destroying with her hands, a sweet smell from a nervous gesture.

"I'm surprised you know how to dance so well." He commented without thinking.

She laughed, "Did you think I spent all of my life learning nothing but how to crack people's skulls in and learn to use a shield?"

"You could have. I know that has been my life. I assumed that it had been yours as well since you also served the Chantry for so many years."

She shook her head. "I was born to nobility and some of those skills have stuck around despite my best efforts to never utilize them."

His grin was gentle towards her, "You should use them more often. It is a nice change."

"There are not many who I want to dance with. Consider yourself....special to me."

"For that I am glad then." He said. As the music played on he could feel a lot of his worries and stress fade away. Despite the fact that there was a breastplate between them Cassandra's arms still felt like the softest thing he had experienced in ages. He leaned in close and rested his head on her shoulders, grateful that she was close in height to him. His hands moved so they were both around her waist and she moved hers to his shoulders as they swayed to the sound of the violins. He clung to her like she was the last bit of hope he had that in the end everything would be okay, closing his eyes and appreciating how solid she felt.

Her calloused hands found his face as he moved his head backwards to look at face once more. Gently she pressed her lips to his and he could feel her pulse quicken with the gesture. He all too eagerly accepted the gesture, pressing her closer to him. She opened her mouth and his tongue slid in, trying to lessen the space between them in any way possible. When they parted he was grinning more broadly than he had in ages. 

"I suppose then I am special to you as well?" She asked, though by her grin she already knew the answer.

"Very. You are dearer to me than you realize, Cassandra. The moments we share may be brief, but they are the only shelter I have at times."

She grinned, "I think we should both go back to the party. They will begin to wonder what happened to us."

"They can wonder a few minutes longer." He said, "Just enough for one more song."

"I am rather fond of this song." She said, her eyes never leaving his.


	3. Chapter 3

The moon shone brightly over the streets of Denerim making the stone walls light up like they were made of silver rather than brick and thatch. Cassandra would never have admitted to another soul that she appreciated all that artistry, but at least in her thoughts she could allow herself to witness the beauty of the Maker and not feel like a silly little girl for doing so. In a world as rife with blood shed and loss she chose to take her joys where she could.

Not that she would get much of a chance to relax and enjoy the moonlight. The Inquisitor had sent her here on business to talk to King Alistair and deliver the missive that they were doing everything within their power to prevent the demons from reaching the capital. It was grueling work, distant and often times unforgiving, but at least she knew that she was doing some good in the realm even if she had wished that it was more with fighting than diplomatic missions. Cassandra was not one for diplomacy, it was an awful lot of talking to say things that could be said much simpler most of the time, but that is why the Nightingale and Cullen had been sent along with her.

Cullen. That boy was going to become a problem for her soon, though not through anything of his own doing. More than once on the trip she had caught herself staring over at him as they rode alongside each other and wondering just what his lips would feel like on hers or if he liked poetry. They had not kissed since that fatefully night a month ago, but that is not to say that she was not eager to recreate the experience. She had only stopped with Liliana had begun giggling, commenting, "I am not sure if you are looking for a threat in our dear templar's face or contemplating , but something is certainly transfixing on him is it not? If I didn't know any better I would swear you fancied him."

Sometimes she just wanted to punch her dear superior spy mistress right in her smug, smiling face.

"I was simply looking into nothingness." Cassandra said, just a touch too quickly, "I barely even registered what I was seeing."

"Oh?" the red head giggling again, "My mistake. I should know that women like you have no such feelings, even towards very handsome men with lovely square jaws."

"Ladies. You know I can hear you, right?" Cullen said, deliberately not making eye contact with either of them as he rode his horse forward.

"I know. That is half the fun of it." Liliana responded shamelessly.

Cassandra glared angrily at her companion before training her eyes forward. She didn't even want to know if Cullen was looking at her right now. Really.

As if summoned by the waves of her thoughts, she ran straight into the man who she definitely wasn't wondering what he was doing tonight. So lost in thought was she that she almost bowled him over, but he quickly recovered himself- looking at his feet and hands and brushing off his grey shirt and checking his black breeches for traces of mud.   
"Oh. Terribly sorry about that Cassandra." He said, "You didn't get hurt did you?"

She looked at him sourly as she brushed small amounts of dust off of her dark purple and gold tunic, "It takes more than a chance run-in to take me down." She softened her words a little, aware that she might be coming off as quite the harpy to the person she least wanted to seem like,"But thank you for the concern."

"Tis truly no problem," he said with a sleight wince at the instinctual turn of phrase that did not quite fit the situation. Heedlessly he blundered on, "It's kind of good that I ran into you. I was actually going back to the Inn to try and find you."

"Find me?" she asked, genuine surprise upon her face, "Why?" This had better not be a joke.

"Well me and some of the local templars are going out for drinks in one of the bars. I wanted to know if you wanted to join us." His grin looked positively devilish.

Cassandra's first instinct was to say no. It would be safer to say no, go back and work on writing letters to other allies that they would need to harvest. If she went out, doubtless Liliana would only talk more and whisper to Josephine rumors about them. No, clearly the right answer was no.

Her mouth had other opinions on the matter and before she could fully think the words, "That sounds like it could be a good deal of fun," were out of her mouth. 

The templar looked relieved, "You will?" he asked, as if he didn't believe his ears, "Of course you will." He answered, giving her a wonderful grin that definitely did not make her heart speed up a few step. "We're going now. If you care to join me, I can show you where the bar is." He extended the crook of his elbow gallantly.

Cassandra took it, liking the solid way his arms felt beneath his grey tunic. Normally she would have protested that she was not a maid that needed escorting, but her tongue seemed to be lied up in a lump in the back of her throat at the moment. Curious.

They wound their way through the streets til they came to a place close to the church labelled, "The Crock and Barrel" with a giant mug of ale and a soup spoon on the sign leading in. On the inside it was a small, but cozy place. A fireplace cast light over the reddish wood of the furniture in the room and there were hunting trophies decorating the walls. A group of men and women who looked to be about templar age stood beneath a large stuffed fox.

Cullen lead them over to the group which greeted him with warm words and her with a cool glance. Taking a step backwards Cullen made the introductions, giving Cassandra a small bow as he introduced each member of the templar that he was friends with. To be honest, almost as soon as he said the names Cassandra had forgotten them but she nodded and shook all of their hands nonetheless.  
The night progressed the way obligatory social events typically did. There were casual conversations made over warm beer and Cassandra drank a little more than she usually did because the conversation was good-natured. To be fair, all of them drank a fair bit more than they usually did that night, so she highly doubted that she was alone in feeling her head begin to feel a bit dizzy. The dizziness lasted as the night wore on and slowly the templars all went back to their abodes. At last it was only her and Cullen.

"What time is it?" he asked, turning to her as the last of his friends left.

"About after 2, judging by the clock on the wall." she said, motioning with her chin to a wooden cuckoo clock that gave two peeps.

"We should probably head back." He grumbled ruefully, taking the last of his beer out of the glass.

Though she could not deny that she was disappointed, Cassandra also realized that he was being quite reasonable. "I suppose we should." She said, mirroring him by finishing her own ale.  
He extended an arm again, this time the grin a bit more loose, "Shall we?" he asked.

It would be rude to turn him down, of course, she said to herself as she latched onto his arm again. Was the bar always this warm?

Once more they walked out into the moonlight, it smoothing out their worry lines, scars, and scattered grey hairs that were left behind in the wake of their battles. They looked positively young in this light and felt like it too.

"I do hope you had fun tonight," Cullen said, leaning closer to her as he spoke lowly.

She nodded, "I did. Your friends were more colorful than I was expecting career templars to be."

Cullen laughed, "Yes. Us darling little church boys have a way of surprising you, don't we?" He responded cavalierly.

Cassandra laughed, "Try not to let it go to your head too much. I-I was just used to Nevarran templars who do not have as many barracks escapades as you and your friends do." She could feel herself stumble over her words and hated herself a little for it.

Cullen responded by smoothly tripping over his own feet. He reeled a little into her and both of them went into the wall of the building in the alleyway solidly with their shoulders, though not hard enough to hurt. Trying to save the situation he spun himself around and pressed Cassandra into the wall, solidly but she knew if she made even the slightest motion to pull away that he would oblige. "There honestly haven't been that many escapades from me. I barely left the training room. I guess I just needed something special to convince me to have a few of those."  
Calloused fingers wove their way through his blonde hair and pushed his face close to hers. Something had to happen and it had to be tonight. Every day they fought for their existence, they deserved some happiness amidst all of that darkness- a chance to connect with someone.

Maybe it was the booze or the fact that she was never the girl that the handsome men liked chasing after before, but as their lips met her whole world seemed to melt away. All that remained was his tongue sliding against hers and the warmth of his breath upon her neck. Her hands wove their way under his grey tunic, feeling the hard curves of his muscles beneath her hands. Hot the world was so hot and she wanted nothing more than to tear off her clothes and take him right here in the alleyway. Judging from the excitement that his privates were causing as they pressed up against her thighs he wanted much the same thing.

His hands were working her belt and his large hands moved down her waist band, moving aside the trousers and simple underwear band. For a moment his hand rested there, above the curls of her private's hair and she could feel him smirking into her kiss. His head moved to her ears and he said lowly into her ear, "All you get tonight is a taste. When we finally join, I want it to be right."  
With a frustrated groan Cassandra moved her hands to the hand that was down her pants. With an effort she moved his fingers closer to her clitoris, "Then give me a taste, but give me something." she moaned, as he gingerly began to massage her clit. There, that was something.

He took his time with her, relishing the eager look of desire upon her face. Her hands moved along his belt buckle and as he drew gentle circles around her clit she slid one hand down past his waistband to caress his stiff length. A small moan escaped his mouth and he began to thrust into her hands. The pace on his ministrations upon her quickened as she pushed back his foreskin and ran her hand up and down his shaft. 

Closer, closer they climbed towards ecstasy. "More." Cassandra moaned, her own hips now moving of their own accord, up and down, up and down. To tease her more Cullen slid one finger, and then two inside of her. She gasped as the addition of the fingers pushed her over the edge and she held onto his hand with her free one as she cried out roughly and came for the first time in many years. She pulled Cullen close and moaned into his kiss, never letting her hand stop moving til he spilled his seed not long after she had been granted release.

Panting, they both stood leaning against the wall and each other as they withdrew their hands from each other's respective pants. Neither said all that much for a while before Cullen whispered close to her, "And just think. That was only a taste of what is to come."

Cassandra laughed, "I look forward to it, provided neither of us die to demon attacks before that happens." 

They both began to walk back, now almost shy in the after glow of their brief sexual encounter. Cullen suddenly grimaced, "How long do you think before Liliana finds out about this?"

Cassandra looked a bit sour, "Well I for one don't intend on telling her that I came behind a bar like a washwoman's daughter with her first boyfriend." She paused, blushing quite against her will, before adding in, "And considering how transfixed she was upon the King tonight I would not be surprised if she was getting herself some release in his personal chambers tonight."

"You are right," He commented with a begrudging nod of his head, "I simply worry. I do not want...our affairs to overshadow our contributions."

Her will resolute Cassandra responded with, "If it comes to that, we shall deal with it together. It will take more than mere lust to overshadow us."


End file.
